Why is it important to forgive?

It is imperative for our own healing that we release the past and forgive everyone.

“I forgive you for not being the way I wanted you to be. I forgive you and I set you free.”

I’ve been talking to a young lady today who has an interesting story…

She works with an ex boyfriend who decided to end their relationship to go back to his wife, over a year and a half ago.

She talked about how he had brought up his wife in two separate conversations recently, and this was really triggering her.

She talked about their past, how he did this to her, and how he did that, and now here he was, trying to get a rise out of her, but all I was seeing was a lovely young lady who was very much in “victim mode” and it was clear she was far from moving on from this relationship.  By hanging onto this wound, she was causing herself more pain.

What’s interesting about this situation, is that the relationship ended over a year and a half ago, so why was she still hurting so much?

From what I could work out, she was holding onto a lot of anger and resentment towards him, and likely also herself, and it was this anger that was causing the trigger.  She is now seeing a lovely guy who treats her really well, so it’s hard to understand why she’s yet to move on.

This is where forgiveness comes in.  This girl needs to forgive him, and she needs to forgive herself.

Forgiveness is not about condoning what happened, and it’s absolutely NOT about making it ok – it’s about letting that shit go, and forgiving the other person (and/or yourself!) for not being the person he/she/you should have been at that time.

So… it’s now time to let that shit go! xo