I hate to admit it, but I have been guilty for falling for a man’s potential, rather than for what was right in front of me at the time.
I was seeing a guy for 2.5 years, and while there were some good moments, there were a LOT more bad moments with him. But I kept thinking “Things will get better once X happens”…
But the thing is, things were NOT great between us. It never was great. Ever. But I hung in there, in the hope that things would improve. I’m a great catch right, so of COURSE he would treat me better over time… How silly I was!
Looking back, I can clearly see that we were just not good together. We never were. We were probably a little too different, and how he liked to show me “affection” was through buying me expensive gifts. And while I loved to receive gifts from him, what I really wanted was affection and for him to say something nice once in a while.
It was never forthcoming! So why did I stay????
It’s because I was focused on his potential to give me the affection and the words I needed. Yes, he did have potential to do that (it’s not that hard, right?), but the reality was, he wasn’t giving that. And that was his choice.
So if you’re with someone now, how do you feel with him right now? Is he treating you right, is he showing you affection the way you love to receive it? Do you feel amazing in his presence right now??
If not, it’s time to consider whether it’s his potential you’re in love with, or what’s right in front of you in the moment. Because what you’re seeing right now is the reality. xxx
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