If I want plastic surgery does it mean I lack self esteem?

Today’s post kind of continues on from yesterday’s post where I talk about making choices based on whether or not you have control over a situation.

It’s also sparked from a conversation I was involved in on Facebook yesterday where a young woman posted a picture of herself, asking something like “What do you think?” on her fan page.

This particular girl has the flattest abs I have EVER seen! She is unbelievably fit and her lovely personality shines through in the videos she and her business partners post on YouTube. They offer a free workout program which they advertise via a website, YouTube and Facebook. She has thousands of Facebook “fans”, many of which are seeing great results from following the workouts which are posted most days. See http://bodyrock.tv for more info – it’s definitely worth a look.

Anyway, this picture has so far received 2014 “Likes” and 770 comments (at the time of writing), so it’s sparked a lot of interest.

And the reason for this is because this girl recently had breast implants – and hair extentions!

Thankfully most of the comments are positive, some even saying that they hope she’s made these changes for her and not somebody else. This is a fair enough comment. If we’re going to make changes to our bodies or our looks, it should be for ourselves, and definitely not for somebody else. But mostly they’re saying she was beautiful before and is still beautiful now, and offering their support. It feels nice to read these comments. 🙂

Sadly though, this girl has received a LOT of negative comments about the changes, accusing her of being superficial and not about the workouts, how she now looks “fake”, and basically putting her down and judging her for making the changes she made.

Some are even “threatening” to stop following her facebook updates. She’s offering a FREE service remember!? So no great loss!

I just could not believe that people’s judgements were so publically put out there and it acurately reflects how badly some people feel about themselves (when you judge others, it’s time to take a look in the mirror because there’s something inside you that you’re judging).

My belief is that if you don’t have something nice to say, or you can’t be contstructive, then please don’t say it. You might be feeling down, but that’s no reason to bring down those around you.

Ok, so does the fact that she had plastic surgery mean that she has low self esteem?

My answer to that is “No”. If you lack self esteem, whether or not you have plastic surgery has absolutely nothing to do with it, although I do agree that some poeple with low self esteem may get surgery to help them feel better (although this doesn’t work).

Remember yesterday when I talked about being in a situation you have control over? If you hate your hair, you go get a hair cut. If you don’t like how you look first thing, you put on makeup. So why is having your breasts enlarged any different? Ok, it’s a lot more extreme, but some people clearly have some aspects of themselves that they don’t like, so they make the choice to change it – and sometimes the only way to make that change is via surgery (trust me, there is only so much a push up bra can do!). 😉

If you’re overweight, you can choose to exercise – or go and get gastric band surgery! And if you exercise regularly to stay in shape, does that mean you have low self esteem because you’re trying to change how you look? No I don’t think so – it means you care about your health and when you look good, you feel good (who doesn’t?!).

Here’s what I think: I have the flattest chest in Australia (ok, slight exaggeration!), and I often feel frustrated when trying on clothing that just doesn’t fit or sit right, because I just don’t “fill” the clothes. I have a great figure apart from that (I was blessed at birth, although I do exercise regularly), but this aspect really frustrates me sometimes.

It doesn’t mean I have low self esteem, but it does mean I have something in my life that I’m not 100% happy about. If I see a dress I absolutely love, then I want to be able to try it on and it fits. But more often than not, I walk away from the store feeling disappointed.

So if I had a spare $10,000 I’d probably do the same thing this girl did. And I’d be just as happy with me as before – except that my wardrobe would look a LOT better!

But if I never got it done I’d be fine (although not as well dressed), but my life wouldn’t be awful if I didn’t.

And that’s what it comes down to.

If you feel good about yourself despite your flaws, then making changes to those flaws won’t change who you are on the inside, but you’ll feel even better than you did before!

On the other hand, if you really are letting your flaws rule your life and you feel down about yourself because of them, then surgery is NOT going to fix anything and I wouldn’t recommend you go and have a procedure done.

And finally, to those who judge… Please take a long hard look at yourself before you pass judgement on somebody who is obviously a very good person who is offering something to thousands of people to benefit them – without even charging for it.

Gratitude goes such a long way – let’s focus on that!