The beauty of contrasts

In spiritual circles, nothing is “good” or “bad”.. it just “is”. For most of us this can be a pretty tough pill to swallow because if your life is horrible right now, it feels BAD!

I recently read “Ask and it is given” by Esther & Jerry Hicks, and they talk about these “good” and “bad” moments as contrasts.

What they say is that we are shown these contrasts (such as bad or negative moments) so that we know what we do not want and can decide what we do want.

So let me give you an example (from my own personal experience!)…

I was once married to a man who was verbally and emotionally abusive. When I walked away from that marriage, I knew in my bones that I never, ever wanted to find myself in such an awful situation again.

So I knew what I didn’t want.

Over many years, I slowly built a picture of what I did want, based on the contrasts I faced many times over the years, until I finally met “Mr Right”!

I have another example as it relates to money, and sadly my contrast kicked off in that same marriage! You see, my husband at the time was terrible with money. He had no problem spending money we didn’t have, on things we didn’t need, and eventually the debt collectors started calling.

This showed me what I did not want, and as I walked away from that marriage, I vowed to never allow myself to be in that situation again.

Thankfully I have kept my word and have not had to go down that awful road again.

Be careful of the traps!

While contrasts are actually there to show us what we don’t want, there are potential traps you could fall into:

1. You could get stuck on your focus on the contrast and therefore attract more of the contrast into your life; and
2. If you get stuck, you’re at risk of spiralling into a pit of contrast “hell”!

So how do I stop myself from falling into the traps?

The contrasts are there to help us grow, but it’s important you don’t allow yourself to fall into the traps, so here’s what you can do if you feel yourself focusing on something you don’t want, :

1. Acknowledge that thought
2. Acknowledge that by focusing on that thought, you are at risk of attracting more of what you don’t want
3. Think about what you do want, and focus on that
4. Repeat!

The key is to prevent those negative thoughts from consuming you so they don’t take over your life. If you can make a conscious effort to focus on what you do want during these times, you will turn things around much faster!