What to do if you ever feel like you’re not good enough

If you’ve ever felt like you’re good enough it’s because of stories you’ve told yourself, or things other people have said to you in the past – and you believed those things.

I had a great family life as a child. I have two brothers and a sister who I love dearly, my parents were supportive and loving, but I somehow ended up with very low self esteem and feeling as though I just couldn’t measure up.

Where did this come from??

Some of it came from school. Kids are cruel sometimes, and unfortunately I wasn’t equipped to handle this, and I took everything they said to me, to heart. I began to believe their words, and I internalised them, and they became a part of who I was.

Fast forward a few years and I found myself married to a verbally abusive and controlling man. Ick! I cringe now at the thought of ending up with somebody like that, because I wouldn’t wish it on anybody!

So many times I considered taking my own life, just so I could be away from all of this pain!

So why didn’t I just leave him?

Because I really didn’t think I was good enough. I wasn’t good enough to find somebody better, I wasn’t good enough to get out there on my own, I wasn’t good enough to have a better life.

So I kept telling myself these negative stories, but a little voice inside me kept speaking up and telling me that I deserved so much better, and to look at my good points, and to focus more on those!

It took a long time, but I eventually broke out of that negative pattern and began to believe that yes, I was in fact good enough and I did deserve better!

I was lucky in that my parents had begun to drum this stuff into my head several years earlier, but not everybody has parents as clever as mine!

So what can you do if you feel like you’re not good enough?

Try these things and see if they help:

  • Grab a notebook and write down 5 things you like about yourself. These can be physical or something related to your wonderful personality! Add to this list every day if you can!
  • Refer back to this list throughout your day – stick them where you will see them regularly.
  • Take extra care when you get ready for your day. Apply makeup, do your hair, dress in a way that makes you feel good about yourself.
  • Choose a day this coming week where you will pretend that you ARE in fact good enough, for the entire day, and on this day, take note of every little thing that happens differently.
  • Smile! If you smile, you can’t help but feel a little better about yourself, even if it’s a teeny smile! :)

Every little positive thing you do for yourself will make a difference. As you “teach” yourself to act more positively, you will attract more positive events into your life.

Try this for a month and see what a difference it makes!

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