It is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all

Love is in the airI love this saying, because I believe it to be soooo true! And there’s a reason for this belief…!

Let me take you back almost a year ago…

I had finally woken up to myself and walked away from a very toxic relationship which had lasted over 2 years, so I was feeling a little fragile.

A male friend from work had indicated that he had a single friend that he wanted to introduce me to, and while I was a bit wary of jumping into anything too soon, I agreed to meet him.

WELL! This fella and I clicked INSTANTLY! He was the sweetest, most amazing guy I had EVER met. EVER! The second we laid eyes on each other, we were both smitten! I’m not sure what was going on there, but my feelings for this guy were intense! And it seemed he felt the same way, and we were messaging each other every day – he would always say the sweetest things! I’d never experienced this before in my life – I felt VERY special!

So that’s the good part…

This “relationship” lasted all of about two and a bit weeks, during which time we caught up twice. And then things went quiet…

So I messaged him to ask if something was up. And sure enough, he’d gone back to his cheating girlfriend. He was very apologetic and kept saying how amazing I was, and if things were different and if he wasn’t so hung up on his girlfriend, then maybe we stood a chance.

I kind of knew we were doomed from the start (different lifestyles, he wanted children – I didn’t, and a bunch of others), but this news absolutely devastated me. Thankfully I was home alone, because I cried my heart out at the news!

I was talking to a male friend of mine online, saying how surprised I was at my reaction to his news. I told him I had no expectations of anything more with this guy, so why was I feeling such a LOSS???

And here’s the gist of what my friend told me:

“You’re grieving the loss of the experience. It’s not something you’ve experienced before – you haven’t been treated so well by somebody before.”

He also went on to say to be prepared, because now that I know what it feels like to be treated this way, I’m going to meet more men who will treat me this way.

It’s like this….

Let’s say you want a new car. You’ve decided on the exact make and model you like, and you’re excited about owning a car like that. And all of a sudden you’re seeing that type of car everywhere! Has that ever happened to you?

The thing is, they were always there, but until you decided you wanted THAT car, your mental filters were blocking them out. Now that you have made your decision, your filter is lifted, and you’re able to see cars of that same make and model.

Same as with relationships. Now that I knew how I wanted to be treated, guess what happened? Within 2 weeks, I met someone who had me so far up on that pedestal it was ridiculous! Needless to say, that one didn’t last because I was probably a little too high up for my liking!

But the point I’m trying to make here is that if you’ve loved and lost, at least you know how it feels like to love, and you’re more likely to find more of the same – or better in the future! If you didn’t know, then it’s hard to recognise it if it appeared before you.

The last 6 months have been crazy for me, and I’m loving every second! Plus I’m meeting men who treat me even BETTER than the gorgeous angel of a man I met almost a year ago.

Who would’ve believed it huh?? :)

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