How can I tell if he’s interested in me?

So often I hear the question “How can I tell if he’s interested in me?” and with around six months of being properly back on the dating scene again, I can honestly say that if he’s interested, you’re going to know about it – if you do things the right way! 😉

These days, women are taught to go for what they want, and that includes getting the man. Problem here is that while chasing a man might bring you some short term results, in the long term you’ll end up disappointed, and it’s possible he will lose interest.

Most men are good guys. They’re brought up to treat women with respect, and don’t intentionally want to cause a woman pain and heartache. So when you initiate calls or texts, he will very likely respond – because that’s what his mother taught him!

Is that what you want?

What if you were to go about your life, keeping yourself busy, and being just happy little you, and suddenly you hear from him? Isn’t that a much better feeling? You will KNOW that he has contacted you because he WANTS to talk to you!

I’ve been a bit crazy with dating lately, with around a dozen guys trying to book my time. Some I’m feeling open to, but others I’ve weeded out for various reasons. But I let them all pursue ME!

If I like the guy, I will always respond when he initiates contact. And I will be warm and welcoming. I don’t play games. If I’m interested, he’s going to know about it in how I respond to his advances.

As a result, I have men in my life who value me as a person, who know I will always put myself first, and who know that if they want my time, they’d better book me in advance or they miss out! They also know I enjoy my time with them, and because they enjoy their time with me, they want more of it.

They’re regularly making contact, booking me for dates, taking me out, and making sure they have my attention. It’s like they almost KNOW there’s competition out there and they could lose me in a heartbeat.

And the great thing about this is that I know without a doubt who is truly interested in me and who isn’t. Those who don’t contact me very often, or seem to disappear for days or weeks on end, might as well not exist. I have others there to distract me from those little blips on the radar who will eventually weed themselves out of my life anyway. No great loss.

I started dating as a means to just get out and meet new people. While I eventually want something long term, I don’t have to have it now. Dropping my agenda has really allowed me to just go with the flow and enjoy being wined and dined every single week, several times a week!

It’s no wonder my waist line is struggling!!!

If I had chosen to chase any of these men, I would have NO CLUE as to who was truly interested in me and who wasn’t.

So stop chasing. No more initiating contact. No more incessant texts. No more thinking about him night and day. No more sitting by the phone waiting for him to call.

Just get out and enjoy your life! If he is interested, you’ll hear from him. And if he doesn’t contact you, then thankfully he let you know now that he’s not interested in you that way – time to move on to the next lucky guy who gets to meet you!


  1. Have you ever thought that a guy had a horrible memory and that’s why he didn’t remember that you have three siblings? Or maybe you assumed that the guy you’re interested in is slightly awkward or nervous around you and that’s why he never asks questions about your life and only talks about himself. Well here’s a newsflash: if he’s not remembering important details about you, it’s most likely because he doesn’t care to remember. “When I like a girl, I usually make a mental note of big things she talks about so I can bring it up in conversation later or make a point to show that I remembered,” says a University of New Hampshire senior. “If I’m just hooking up with a girl and have no desire for it to go any further, why would I waste time trying to remember details of her life when I can hook up with her without doing that?” So when you have to repeat seven times that you’re a psychology major, it’s probably best to assume that he’s just not that into you. 6. He flirts with other girls right in front of you.

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