How can I make a difficult decision?

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Sometimes when you’re forced to make a difficult decision, you ponder it over and over again, not knowing which way to turn.  It can be stressful (depending on the situation) and coming to a decision seems almost impossible.

When you have a decision to make, you’re obviously faced with choices.  Will I go with Option 1 or with Option 2?

More often than not, it’s difficult to see which option poses the most benefits or drawbacks, which is where this tool comes in.

This tool is called the Benefits and Drawbacks Grid.

This grid has helped many of my clients to come to a decision they’ve been pondering for what seems like forever.  It finally provided them with the clarity they needed to choose with option to go with.

So here’s what you do…

  1. Replace the words “Option 1” and “Option 2” with what each of your choices are.  You  can add extra columns if you have more than two choices, but I’ve used just two here to give you an example.
  2. List all of the benefits and drawbacks for each option in the relevant box.  So for Option 1, in the top left hand box you will write down all of the benefits for that option.  In the box below that, you will write down all of the drawbacks of this option.  Repeat this process for Option 2.  You may need to think long and hard about this, but brainstorm your ideas and write them as they come to mind.
  3. Once you have finished this step, review the grid and see if one option stands out as the preference to the other.  Sometimes this is quite obvious, but at other times it’s not so obvious and you may need to decide if the benefits and drawbacks of one are better/worse than the other.

 

Option 1

Option 2

Benefits

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Drawbacks

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is just one of the many tools you can use to make a decision and it’s great because seeing your lists on paper really helps you to clearly see where the clear benefits and drawbacks for each option are.

Until next time, have a fantastic day!

How to change your focus to something positive

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I don’t know about you but sometimes I find myself dwelling on a negative aspect of my life, but no matter how bad it feels, I sometimes find that I hang on to those negative feelings, kind of like I don’t want to let them go.

The reason we tend to do this is because we are getting something out of it! We could be receiving sympathy or attention for the negatives in our life, or it could be just that we’re so used to the negative feelings that we feel “safer” with them than without.

You may not even know why you are clinging to these feelings too. It could all be happening on a subconscious level.

But let me tell you from somebody who’s queen of hanging on to stuff, that life is better – in fact, ALL aspects of your life are better – if you let go of the negative stuff and change your focus on to something positive!

Now here’s the challenge. Sometimes it’s not easy to change your focus when you’re sooooo invested in the negative feelings. So today I’m going to give you a tool to help you to move that focus on to something that will better serve you.

So here goes!

  1. Alright! I want you to imagine a butterfly. Your butterfly can be any colour at all, but it must be a colour that makes you feel good. This site is full of butterflies, and they’re all pink I believe. That’s the colour of mine, but you might prefer yellow or blue or purple.
  2. Next, imagine that you have your negative feelings all balled up next to you. You can see this ball is cold and grey and it doesn’t look inviting or nice at all.
  3. In the distance, think of something or someone that makes your heart sing. It could be your children or other close family members, it could be you living your life purpose, or it could just be the thought of you sitting on a warm tropical island, sipping pina coladas!
  4. Imagine your butterfly is flying away from the negative feelings, and fluttering towards your positive things. Follow your butterfly in your mind.
  5. As your butterfly flutters around whatever it is you’re imagining, imagine the feelings you feel when you’re around your love ones, while living your life’s purpose or sitting on that island. Really feel those feelings!

Ok! Now how do you feel?? Better? Even a teeny bit better??

If you’re feeling exceptionally bad, you may need to do this exercise several times a day. When you go to the bathroom that would be a perfect time to really use this tool – no point wasting that time on idle thoughts, right? 😉

Haha! It doesn’t really matter where you are, and you really can run through the five steps above really quickly if you need to. The key here is to acknowledge your bad feelings, then turn your back on them and “walk” towards your positive feelings.

I’d love to hear how you go with this exercise!

Happy Mothers Day!

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Happy mothers day to all of you mothers out there (I’m not sure if Australia’s the only country celebrating this today, but happy mothers day anyway!)!  A little over 13 years ago I became a mother myself for the first time, and I distinctly remember feeling an amazing sense of unconditional love, for the first time in my entire life.

It was unlike anything I had ever experienced it all, and was so intense that I worried that when my second beautiful angel was born, that I wouldn’t love her as much.

But the moment I laid eyes on her, I experienced that same intense love all over again.

Even though I’ve had my challenges over the years, and although I have a lot of my focus on my career, business and relationships, being a mother to me has been (and probably always will be) the most important aspect of my life.  My children come first above all else.  But I still make time for me!

Being a mother is hard work, and it’s important you have time for yourself sometimes.  We often get caught up in all of the other aspects of our life, and forget that we need looking after too.

So if you’re on a mission to lose some weight for example, but you rarely have time to exercise, then today is the day that you schedule half an hour, three times a week to exercise – just as you would an appointment at the doctor.  If you made that appointment you’d show up right?  So treat your exercise regime the same way.  Book it in!

If your relationship with your significant other needs some work, book him in for a “date”.  Spend some time alone together.  Once you have children, this aspect of relationships often stops happening and things get dull.  Spice things up a little!

If there’s something you’ve always wanted to do, such as attend a Zumba class, hike up a local mountain, write your first novel or even jump out of a plane, choose today as the day in which you start planning this activity.  Set a date, find out the costs, work out how you’ll pay for it (if needed) or what you’ll need to get started.  And START!

If you’ve been wanting to return to work, change your career, or improve your skills, start looking at the job ads, update your resume, look into courses, see if your employer will pay for some additional study for you.

Choose today as the day in which you make at least one small improvement to your life!  That’s the first step towards living a life worth living!  :)

How to deal with negative thoughts

Banish negative thoughts

Sometimes, when you’re dealing with the pain of a relationship breakup, dealing with loss, or even suffering from a cigarette craving, there are some techniques you can apply to reduce or stop your negative thought patterns around these areas.

I found the article below and thought I’d share it with you, because I personally think this is a wonderful tool to help you to get those negative thoughts under control! :)

http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/heal-your-heart/a-great-tool-from-rosa-the-stop-sign/

The Goals and Priorities Diary – Free!

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A Facebook friend of mine, Michele Connolly, has created the Goals and Priorities Diary to help you get organised in 2011 and she’s offering it for free (Normally around $24.95 from her website) if you like her Get Organised Wizard page on Facebook (found here: http://www.facebook.com/GetOrganizedWizard?v=app_10442206389 )

The diary includes a section to write down your yearly and monthly and daily goals, and even a section to write down the goals you have achieved.

What a great way to start moving forward in 2011!

Just “Like” her Facebook page as noted above, then follow the instructions to get your free copy.

Enjoy!

Need help realising your dreams?

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For me, boosting your self confidence begins with setting goals and then working towards achieving them.

As you reach each milestone, you feel a little sense of achievement, and your confidence improves as you take each and every step forward.

My good friend Nik Halik has set up a community especially for people who want to dream big and get out there and realise those dreams, and because it’s free to join, I figured I’d talk about it here on occasion.

The reason for my post today is because I’ve just been sent a video called Pathways to Freedom by Nik and co and it’s really inspirational.

If you want to check out the video, visit http://www.TheThrillionaires.com?id=130, then go into the blog, and search for it there. You will be glad you did!

Free eBook

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Everybody likes a freebie and today I came across an ebook on the Law of Attraction (LOA).

It is 80 pages of LOA info relating to career, relationships and your health and it’s FREE!

I believe that the LOA has a lot to do with the results you are experiencing in your life, and if you can learn to tap into its power, you will start to experience some unbelievable changes in your life.

Building your confidence and self esteem is all about building on your knowledge and skills, and if you ever come across a free offer like this, then take it!

So go to http://www.receivethebook.com/index.php?rid=19755 and download your free ebook today!

 

Boost Your Confidence, Change Your Life!

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Boost Your Confidence, Change Your Life!

That’s the name of my new Self Confidence-boosting guide! It’s your ticket to a wonderful, fulfilling and successful life!

If you have ever despised yourself, contemplated committing suicide, thought you weren’t good enough, have ever been in an abusive relationship, or if you’re just not living the life you feel that only others get to live, then here’s what you need to do right now:

Sign up straight away to receive your FREE copy of Boost Your Confidence, Change Your Life! 

Your Name:
Your Email:

Focus on Abundance

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Focus on Abundance
by Sandy Forster

Australia’s Leading Prosperity Mentor

Abundance, Wealth, Prosperity, Financial Freedom – we all crave it, not just for what the money will do, but for the choices it will give us, for the fun we can create with it, for the life we can live with it. Why is it that some people seem to attract money and riches so easily, and others live their entire lives struggling to make ends meet?

Why does it often seem that the rich just get richer and the poor just get poorer? Well guess what – it’s not about how MUCH money you make, but how you THINK about money and what you DO with that money that will make all the difference between whether you will live a life of Prosperity or one of continual money challenges. But no matter what your situation – it CAN be changed. If you desire MORE Abundance in your life – then read on!

Living the life of your dreams instead of just dreaming about it is all about creating a Millionaire Mindset. And that’s my specialty! I have been a Prosperity Mentor for over 4 years with clients from all over the world. I love to share different strategies, skills, exercises and ideas on how to keep your mind focused on raising the levels of Wealth in your life. Because the more you focus on something, the FASTER you will attract it into your life.

Take a moment to think about where your focus or predominant mental attitude is. And if it’s more on your bills, debts and lack of money, then you MUST begin to focus on wealth, riches and prosperity – or you will never be able to attract it into your life. A surprisingly simple but amazingly powerful exercise to attract prosperity to you takes less than a minute a day, and if you do this daily, you’ll be amazed at what you begin to attract into your life. This exercise is called Abundance Breaths and basically all you need to do is breathe. Well, actually, it’s a little more than that…

As already stated, you become what you focus on. Too often, it can be challenging to know exactly what you do want. You get caught up in trying to make up your mind – “Do I want this or that? What if I get that and I really would have preferred this?” “I thought I wanted this, but now I think I want that”.

Sometimes it’s easier if you can just focus on the feeling of abundance, rather than the specifics of what that abundance will be. It is the feeling that has the attraction power anyway. You can get specific when all the money comes in!

What you should do before this exercise to create avalanches of abundance and prosperity is find a comfy chair and sit down with your feet flat on the floor, back straight and hands resting in your lap with palms facing up. Gently close your eyes and keep them closed. Before you get started just imagine that you are now surrounded by tiny, minute particles of abundance; that you are immersed in a sea of prosperity and you can reach out and touch it and bring it into your life whenever you desire (which you can!).

When you’re ready, take a long, slow, deep Abundance Breath in to the count of three, totally expanding and filling your lungs. Imagine all the while that you are breathing in those particles of prosperity and they are filling every fibre of your being. Feel that feeling of being flooded with abundance. Hold your breath for the count of nine and feel every atom, every cell in your entire body being plumped up with prosperity, filled with abundance, vibrating with riches. And then slowly, to the count of six, breathe out that Abundance to circulate throughout the Universe – really force all that air out.

Once again, take another long, slow, deep Abundance Breath in, and this time, see your body light up from the inside out, glowing with prosperity, sparkling with riches, dazzling with wealth. I like to imagine that my body is glowing from the inside out with that same golden glow that radiates from Scrooge McDuck’s millions, or the gold in Aladdin’s cave! Once again, hold for the count of nine, seeing that glow, feeling that glow, then on the out breath, once again breathe out the abundance to circulate throughout the Universe.

One last time, slowly breathe in a huge big Abundance Breath for the count of three, and while you hold that breath for the count of nine, imagine and feel what it’s like to be totally abundant, amazingly wealthy, to have achieved financial freedom and be rich beyond your wildest dreams. Feel how that feels; feel how light and free and good that feels. Expand that feeling; feel it flood through your body. Embrace that amazing feeling throughout your body, mind and spirit. And for the last time, slowly breathe that abundance and prosperity out to circulate throughout the Universe.

And when you’re ready, slowly open your eyes, feeling prosperous, feeling wealthy, feeling rich, rich, rich! As I said, this is a very easy, very powerful little trick you can do daily or many times, if you want to attract MORE into your life. It only takes a couple of minutes, but has amazing money-magnetizing powers. Once you get really good at your Abundance Breaths, you won’t even need to close your eyes – you will be able to feel those feelings, see your body glowing with prosperity and really feel you are beginning to attract money anytime, anywhere – what fun! Remember, the idea is to focus on what you DO want – and that’s a life filled with prosperity, abundance, riches, wealth and happiness!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sandy Forster, Author of the International Bestseller How to Be Wildly Wealthy FAST, offers more exciting free resources, articles, tele-conferences, books and live events in the areas of prosperity, success and personal empowerment at http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?Clk=2084516

Improve Your Self Esteem in Just One Weekend!

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If your self esteem is keeping you from achieving your hopes, dreams and goals, or it is making you feel inferior, unimportant or unworthy, then keep reading.

I know first hand how hard things can be when you suffer from low self esteem and looking back, I wish I had the resources I now have access to.

Below I’ve put a bit of a “before and after” scenario to show you what a difference improving my self esteem made to my life:

Before

I was an unattractive teen, and I really didn’t like myself very much at all – at times I even despised myself.

Many of my friends were involved in drugs or other unsavoury pastimes.

Many of my boyfriends (there were lots!) were involved in drugs or other unsavoury pastimes.

I was stood up on several occasions and many of the guys I went out with really didn’t treat me the way I deserved to be treated.

I married a man who verbally and emotionally abused me for nine long years. I still didn’t like myself very much.

I was afraid to try new things, and I pretty much remained in a rut during my entire marriage.

After

A lightbulb went on, and I gradually started to work on my self esteem (boy I wish I’d had the internet back then – the process would have been so much quicker!).

After nine years of hell, I finally “woke up” and realised that I deserved so much more. It was the realisation that I was teaching my young daughter that the treatment I was experiencing was ok (because I was putting up with it) that helped me make the decision to leave. I did not want her to experience the pain I had experienced for so long.

Leaving my husband improved my self esteem immensely – maybe it was the realisation that I could do things on my own and do them well!?

I started to attract the “right” kind of men. (I also had a set “criteria” they had to meet in order to get a first date and I wasn’t backing down!).

I really started to enjoy my life for the first time EVER!

I eventually met my new husband who happens to be the most loving, caring, compassionate person I know and he is a wonderful stepfather to my eldest daughter. For the record, he asked me out!

I now like me for me. I don’t look much different to what I did in my teens (apart from my hair!), but it’s more the inside that has changed, and not the outside.

I am living a wonderful, happy life. I am happily married with two beautiful daughters, I have a beautiful home with a huge inground swimming pool, we live in a really nice area and I am lucky enough to work from home.

I am so grateful for all I have and really want to help others to overcome this “disease” called low self esteem.

It isn’t until you have overcome low self esteem that you realise how debilitating it can be. Your life kind of goes on hold while you try to get yourself out of this really big “hole” and life really can be miserable.

I hope my story inspires anyone with low self esteem to do something about it.

Have a great day!

Michelle Green

www.selfconfidence101.com