Thinking back to that time, I was in a verbally abusive relationship with the man who would eventually become my first husband, our financial situation was dismal at best, and I was nowhere near achieving success in my own life.

But I knew it was coming, even though I didn’t know how.

Fast forward to almost 20 years later and I am a certified life coach, I have clients all over the world, I am successful in a career sense (my “real” job), making more money than I thought I would be at this stage of my life, I have skills and knowlege that can make me several hundred dollars (if not more) in any given month if I want to, and I still know there’s so much more to come!

And while I continue to have this belief, I know it will keep on coming!

But what if I’d not been so sure of my future? What if I didn’t beleive I was destined for more? Do you think I would have achieved what I have so far in my life? I’m thinking not!

I’ve had my ups and downs over the years. I have had two marriages end, been involved in a rocky relationship since, and have felt very lost at times. But I never stopped believing that something bigger was coming.

Do you believe there’s more for you out there?

I reflect back on the last year and I realise that I have grown (mentally, not physically!) a LOT! I have learned so much and my life looks nothing like it did 12 months ago. Thank goodness!

2012 is already shaping up to be an amazing year and I can’t wait!

What are your intentions for 2012? If you haven’t done so already, write them down. And once you’ve written them down, write out the steps you will take to achieve what you want to achieve!

Next stick it somewhere so you can see it every single day! Daily reminders come in very handy!

I’m off now to begin my celebrations, so I would like to take this opportunity to wish you a happy and safe new year and I’ll be back soon!!

My first impression of this book when I saw the cover, was HUH??? Here we are, supposedly spreading Christmas cheer, and a book like this is supposed to do that?? I think NOT!

Now I must start off by acknowledging the fact that 100% of the publisher’s profits will be donated to various charities, which of course is a good thing.

Another positive, is that according to the book’s website, it contains stories of courage and the will to survive. That’s great!

So why the awful title? Why is the focus on the horror and not on the beauty of human nature???

Unfortunately, it’s often human nature to choose a book titled “Flood Horror & Tragedy” over something like “Amazing courage” or “The Will to Survive”, which I find very disturbing and sad. Why isn’t there more focus in this world on the GOOD things???

It’s because of the title of this book that I refuse to buy it – I don’t want something that portrays such negativity sitting on my bookshelf. Every time I look at it and read the title, I’m feeding myself negative words! Give me something uplifting and positive any day!

What are you feeding your mind on a daily basis? Positive things or negative things??

The reason we tend to do this is because we are getting something out of it! We could be receiving sympathy or attention for the negatives in our life, or it could be just that we’re so used to the negative feelings that we feel “safer” with them than without.

You may not even know why you are clinging to these feelings too. It could all be happening on a subconscious level.

But let me tell you from somebody who’s queen of hanging on to stuff, that life is better – in fact, ALL aspects of your life are better – if you let go of the negative stuff and change your focus on to something positive!

Now here’s the challenge. Sometimes it’s not easy to change your focus when you’re sooooo invested in the negative feelings. So today I’m going to give you a tool to help you to move that focus on to something that will better serve you.

So here goes!

1. Alright! I want you to imagine a butterfly. Your butterfly can be any colour at all, but it must be a colour that makes you feel good. This site is full of butterflies, and they’re all pink I believe. That’s the colour of mine, but you might prefer yellow or blue or purple.
2. Next, imagine that you have your negative feelings all balled up next to you. You can see this ball is cold and grey and it doesn’t look inviting or nice at all.
3. In the distance, think of something or someone that makes your heart sing. It could be your children or other close family members, it could be you living your life purpose, or it could just be the thought of you sitting on a warm tropical island, sipping pina coladas!
4. Imagine your butterfly is flying away from the negative feelings, and fluttering towards your positive things. Follow your butterfly in your mind.
5. As your butterfly flutters around whatever it is you’re imagining, imagine the feelings you feel when you’re around your love ones, while living your life’s purpose or sitting on that island. Really feel those feelings!

Ok! Now how do you feel?? Better? Even a teeny bit better??

If you’re feeling exceptionally bad, you may need to do this exercise several times a day. When you go to the bathroom that would be a perfect time to really use this tool – no point wasting that time on idle thoughts, right?

Haha! It doesn’t really matter where you are, and you really can run through the five steps above really quickly if you need to. The key here is to acknowledge your bad feelings, then turn your back on them and “walk” towards your positive feelings.

I’d love to hear how you go with this exercise!

But on some conscious level you KNOW you’re better than this. You know you deserve a happier and better life. But you just can’t dig yourself out of this pit of despair.

So today’s post is about helping you to feel just a little bit better about yourself.

I’m not sure if I’ve said it here on the blog before, but if you’re told a lie often enough, soon you’ll start to believe it. So let’s start off today by telling yourself some nice “lies”!

So here’s something you can try:

• Write down at least five things you like about yourself. They could be personality traits (you’re a good person, you’re kind to others, you have a great sense of humour, you’re smart, etc) which are preferred, or they could be physical attributes, such as you have nice hair, nice eyes, you’re pretty, you have a nice figure, etc.
• Review this list EVERY day. Stick it by your bed or on your bathroom mirror. Put it somewhere so you see it first thing every day.
• As you read this list every day, even if you don’t believe it right now, pretend that everything on that list is 100% true.
• Add things to your list as you think of them.

This little task will go a long way towards helping to lift your spirits and allowing you to like yourself just a little bit more! xx

These are questions I’ve asked myself a gazillion times over the years, and I am happy to say that I now (finally!) have the answer!

Knowing your purpose or identifying your passion isn’t always something that comes easy to many people. I know I searched for my purpose in life for a very long time before I finally worked out exactly what it was and what it meant to me.

So once you’ve worked out what your passion or purpose in life is, then what? And why is it so important???

From now on I’ll use “purpose” as my reference to both purpose and passion because I really do think they are very similar or the same in many aspects.

Ok…. when you live without a purpose, you are literally heading nowhere. You’re just living day to day with no clear direction, and I can bet that you’re not feeling too great about yourself either, right? You probably feel lost, wondering why you’re here and why you even bother sometimes.

If you’re in a relationship, it’s likely that without a purpose, you’re totally focused on your man – not on yourself and what you want to do in life, because you really don’t know what you want to do! Without your own purpose, it’s very difficult to have your own interests outside of your relationships too – this is not healthy!

On the other hand, having a purpose gives you the following benefits:

• Your life has a clear direction
• You have a great reason for getting out of bed every day!
• You feel fulfilled and happy because you’re doing what you know you were put on the planet to do!
• Your relationships improve because you’re not solely focused on your partner.
• Finding the motivation to achieve your goals isn’t difficult when they’re in line with your purpose.
• You feel a great sense of satisfaction when your life is congruent to your values and purpose.

These are just some of the many benefits of identifying and living in line with your purpose, and I can assure you that once you’ve identified what your purpose is, you’re going to completely change your perspective on life! In fact, I guarantee it!

Ok, so it’s all well and good to know that identifying your purpose is a great thing, but what if you’re like I was, and you don’t have a CLUE what that is?

I recently read a book which specifically outlines, step by step, how to identify your passions so you can live your life by them, and I can’t recommend this book enough (see below for link). I had the pleasure of meeting one of the Authors recently, and she is the perfect example of somebody who’s truly living their purpose! She’s just so… HAPPY!

So take a look at this book – I definitely recommend it to anybody who’s struggling to identify their true passions in life.

This offer is now closed, and I would like to thank those of you who responded.

I will be emailing each and every one of you within the next two days to let you know if you’ve been successful.

Thanks again to those who participated!

So no matter what area of your life you want to work on, we will work closely together over the next three months to help you to reach your goals – or at least move you a LOT closer to them!

If you’ve not already signed up to receive the free ebook, sign up over there to the right and reply to your welcome email, telling me why you think you should be chosen!

I look forward to possibly working closely with you soon!! Yay!

I know that you get more out of life than you give (it’s just how it is). I also know how much I absolutely LOVE to give and how wonderful it feels when I hear from a client and she’s gushing about how much better her life is, which is ultimately why I am sending you this email today.

So today I want to make a **very limited** offer to you.

I am offering 5 of my subscribers the opportunity to receive three months of free email coaching from me!

So if you’re struggling in a relationship, if you need help with boosting your career prospects, or you’re really just struggling with your self confidence and self esteem in general, then let me help you for three months – FREE!

If you are one of the lucky 5 chosen, then here’s how it will work:

- I will email you an introduction and our coaching relationship begins.
- We will work closely together, working out where you are now and where you want to be, and I may set specific tasks for you to do to move you closer to your goals.
- Once a week we will review your progress and celebrate your successes!
- At the end of the three months, we will review how far you have come and be thrilled at your progress!
- And finally, we will put together a plan to keep you on track for the future.

Exciting huh?

So if you’re interested in this opportunity to receive free coaching, and you’re prepared to give 100% during the next three months, then enter your details over to the right of this page to receive your free ebook, then reply to the welcome email you receive after doing so, telling me why you like to be chosen as one of the 5 to receive this free coaching offer! You have until October 15 before I choose the lucky winners, so be quick!

Good luck and I look forward to the possibly of working closely with you to help you achieve your goals!

So Gina hides herself away from the world as much as possible, hoping this will help. It doesn’t.

Gina has a boyfriend and she knows that he can see the self hatred she pours over herself, and he doesn’t know what to do about it. He wants to help her but doesn’t know where to start. Gina also wonders why he has “settled” for her, because she believes he can do so much better.

She has no direction in her life, she has no interests and she hates to do anything alone. It’s like she can’t stand her own company.

The good news for Gina is that she is aware of what she is feeling and she knows it’s not how she wants to feel and she wants to make changes.

Gina had never asked for help before, so doing so was a huge step for her – this is a turning point in her life for sure!

Now, the first thing I realised for Gina was that she had lost sight of all of her positive points.

Her boyfriend was with her because he WANTED to be! If he didn’t want to be with her, he’d certainly go and find someone else! So I pointed out to Gina that he obviuosly saw something in her that she was failing to see, and he was sticking around because of that.

I did point out to her that the more hatred she poured on herself though, the more chance she had of pushing this wonderful man of hers away.

Now Gina was asking for help in finding new interests in her life, but I felt that before she started looking for new interests, she needed to do some work on herself first!

So here’s what I asked her to try for me:

• Grab a notebook and a pen
• Write down each and every little thing that you like about yourself, and everything that is good about you. I don’t care how small that thing is – just write it down!
• Keep writing until you can’t think of any more.
• Every day, spend five minutes thinking about all of the things you like about yourself, and write them down. Did you do something good today? Were you particularly kind to somebody today? Did you show some affection for a loved one or did you give your pet extra scratches, just because you love them, and you know they appreciated it? Every little thing counts!

This exercise is wonderful, because its aim is to take your focus off your negative thoughts about yourself, while putting your focus on the good things about yourself.

After only two days of following this exercise, Gina was already starting to feel more positive about her life too. She felt less bored with her life and and is learning to like her own company. She also said that she felt my advice was going to go a long way with her.

Over time, Gina’s perception of herself and her life will improve, and that’s when she’ll be more open to finding new interests, which may seem to “magically” fall into her lap and will be perfect for her! This often happens when you’re in a positive mindset.

Ok, so if you’re feeling down on yourself like Gina was, try this exercise for at least a week (longer is better) and take notice of the difference it makes to your outlook in life. I’m thinking you will feel AMAZED!