Whom do you associate with?

"Be careful the environment you choose for it will shape you; be careful the friends you choose for you will become like them."
W. Clement Stone
1902-2002, Author and Businessman

Whilst I rode home on the train yesterday afternoon, I turned the page of the local freebie paper I was reading to see an interview and a photo of a friend of mine, Nik Halik.

Nik is an Adventurer, entrepreneur (he was a millionaire before he turned 30!) and recently became an author.

The article was written to promote his new book, The Thrillionaire, which was recently released. I rushed out to purchase his book today, and read a chapter on my way home. So far so good! I’ll post a review when I finish!

Now, this article isn’t about his book, but more about a question he was asked in the article I was reading.

He was asked what the best advice his parents had given him.

He responded with "You are whom you associate with". Interesting.

Now, look around you. What is your partner like? What are your friends like? Observe them like you’ve never met them before. Do you want to be like them? Or do you want something else?

If this is the case, then look at changing who you associate with. Build a new circle of friends, network with people who are interested in the same things you are.

Very few of us ever look at our families or friends like I have suggested, and it’s not until they really look at them from an outsider’s perspective that they realise that perhaps they should associate with other "types" and that their current associations are not what’s best for them.

Of course, you can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family - you’re stuck with them no matter what! So if your family aren’t helping you to grow and be a better person, what do you do?

For me it has been difficult because I come from a very close family. The problem is that I really have nothing in common with two of my siblings. AT ALL! Once upon a time we had a lot in common. But not now. Over time we have grown apart.

Don’t get me wrong - we still love each other. I even work with one of them! And we get on fine, but only in small doses. What this means is that I rarely see them unless I run into one in the hallway at work, or we have a family celebration. Spend too much time together, and it’s like we’re from different planets. My sister talks about what happened on TV last night and I tune out. I talk about my business and she tunes out.

It’s just the way things are. It doesn’t mean we hate each other, but I much prefer to associate with people who have interests similar to mine!

Things get a LOT harder when it’s your partner or significant other. You hear so many stories of marriages ending because they have "grown apart". Unfortunately I have no solution to offer here. I think it’s just that sometimes people head in different directions in life. Maybe being more involved or taking an interest in what your partner is doing, and asking them to do the same will help?

For me, I have found that associating with people who are successful, inspirational and positive has changed my life for the better. I realise that these people are so "normal" and have always been that way! They’re no different to you and me, except that in Nik Halik’s case in particular, there is a burning desire to achieve their goals. I admire their passion and commitment and courage. They have a "never say die" attitude and it pays off for them. I want to be more like them and take action every day to be like them!

I will be forever grateful for the day that I made the decision to make my life better, because I now have some wonderful friends that include Nik Halik the Thrillionaire.

And as proof that we do actually know each other, here we are at a Money Masters event in Brisbane! I have had the pleasure of working with Nik, his wonderful sister Victoria and the FFI team on several occasions now and I look forward to working with them again in the future.

Here’s me with inspirational speaker, Johnny Wimbrey. Johnny’s life is one worth reading about! If he can get to where he is now, then anyone can!

I had the pleasure of meeting Stephen Pierce at a seminar in 2006. Stephen also had a bit of a tragic beginning, but again he is proof that it doesn’t matter where you come from - success can be yours!

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I GOT THE JOB!!!

I am thrilled! It’s funny because before I actually applied for the job I kind of had a “feeling” about it. I can’t quite describe it. On the other hand, the thought that this department would want someone who has never worked in that industry before, was not worrying me as such, but I wondered if I’d even get an interview.

Either way I remained positive, wrote my goal down and visualised myself working in the job regularly. It obviously paid off.

I start a week from Monday and I am very excited!

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Did I get the job?

Yes, I had the interview and as usual I walked out thinking of all of the things I should have said but didn’t! Don’t you hate that?

Another thing I did is write (in code) that I had the job already, and stuck it to my computer monitor, so I could see it every day. I did this as a way to convince myself I had the job.

I had to wait almost two weeks before I received a call about the job and the call was to ask me to attend a second interview. I have NEVER had a second interview at this workplace (I started there 6 years ago but resigned last August before returning as a temp in February), so I thought this was a bit strange.

I later found out that they only normally did second interviews with the preferred candidate, to make sure they were a good fit for the area, so this helped to improve my confidence a LOT!

So yesterday was the second interview and I must say, I think it went extremely well! The interview was with the general manager of the department and he kind of told me that I had the job, but he had to run it by the manager I would be reporting to first and there were negotiations to make regarding my move to the new area etc.

So there you go! I should know “officially” by Wednesday I think! Woo hoo!

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ARGH! I have a job interview again!

It’s been a while since I posted here. Life’s pretty busy and now I have another job interview to deal with!

I’m not sure if I talked about this a while back but the job I have right now is temporary to the end of July. After that, they can either extend my contract (which I believe they will) or they can let me go.

I prefer to have stability in my life, so I applied for a couple of permanent positions at the place I currently work.

The first position is at the same level I am currently on, and the other will mean a little promotion. I really don’t mind which one I get - as long as I get one of them!!

So to prepare, I have today written down the parts of the job description which talk about the attributes I should have to be ideal for the position. I have then written examples of where I have used or demonstrated my abilities relating to each attribute.

I will smile a lot, maintain regular eye contact with each of the interviewers and will try to be myself.

I know one of the people interviewing me (there will be 3) and she is really lovely, so I’m happy about that!

Am I nervous? Kind of! I will probably be worse on Wednesday at 3pm which is the day of my interview! ARGH!!! I will post how I go!

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My weight loss challenge

I’ve had this stubborn roll of baby fat around my middle since I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl last year, and even though I’m not overweight as such, it’s been driving me crazy!

So rather than be frustrated about it, I’ve decided to finally take action! That is the very first step anyone who wants to change something in their lives should take, by the way…!

Check out http://overweightandunhappy.com to see how I’m going!

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7 Secrets of Millionaires

 

Millionaires have certain guidelines they live by - that’s one of the reasons they become Millionaires. If you haven’t created the wealth you desire, it can seem the Wealthy are privy to secrets you aren’t. The biggest secret is – you probably KNOW some of these so-called secrets already! You now need to APPLY them in your life, instead of just knowing them and you too can create your own Millions.

1. CONTINUE LEARNING To become a Millionaire, you must first create a Millionaire Mindset. Many Millionaires believe that your greatest asset is your knowledge. Your thoughts shape your future - choose your thoughts wisely. To realise your full potential, you need to continually be learning, discovering and educating yourself. Invest in your greatest asset by reading books, listening to audios and attending seminars constantly. By continuing your education beyond formal school years you will achieve more in life than you ever imagined. For dozens of free prosperity resources visit http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?Clk=2084518

2. LIVE BELOW YOUR MEANS This may not be the hot tip you expected, but this secret will assist you toward Millionaire status no matter what your income. A quote from Bill Earle sums it up perfectly “If your outgo exceeds your income, then your upkeep will be your downfall”. The typical Millionaire spends less than he earns, and invests the difference. Millionaires prefer to sacrifice high consumption today to achieve financial freedom tomorrow and for a lifetime.

3. BUILD A BUSINESS AROUND WHAT YOU LOVE Most of the richest people in the world own one or more businesses. To create true wealth, you must involve yourself in your own business – preferably doing something you love. Millionaires get that way because they do what they love. They love what they do so much that it rarely feels like work – they put their heart into it and the money just flows. This is where the money is – you will never get rich working for someone else. Find something you love, something you’re passionate about, create a business around what you love and watch the money flow to you.

4. BE PERSISTANT On your way to creating your own millions, you will definitely face some minor and major obstacles. The secret is to overcome these obstacles and move on. Do not give up - be persistent. True long-term wealth is achieved only by striding over, under and through the obstacles along your path to riches. “The road to success leads through the valley of humility, down the path of patience and across the wide barren plains of perseverance. As yet, no short cut has been discovered”

5. LEVERAGE YOUR TIME AND MONEY Millionaires do not have the time nor the inclination to do everything themselves and when it comes to making millions they don’t just use their own money. If you want to be a Millionaire you have to know how to leverage. Millionaires hire the right people to do far more than they possibly could themselves. And they utilise other people’s money to invest in income-producing assets.

6. INVEST IN REAL ESTATE ”One thing the Rich uniformly have in common is that almost without exception – the Rich either made their Wealth in Real Estate or they keep their Wealth in Real Estate” stated world famous Real Estate Investor, Dr. Dolf de Roos. It’s never too late to begin your Real Estate Investing career – with the right education and support you will be able to create long term secure wealth to pass onto future generations. Real Estate investing is one of the best-known ways to create millions – even if you have NO money to begin with!

7. GIVE BACK Many Millionaires are generous with their time and money in helping others. This wasn’t something they began after they became rich, they were givers before, during and after they made their millions. In fact many Millionaires even have their own foundations. They donate a percentage of their wealth to a cause they believe in. The more you give, the more you will receive. Don’t hoard your wealth, share it with others and watch it multiply.

Millionaires dream big, create a strong desire to achieve those dreams and then take consistent action to see their dreams come true. Follow these guidelines and you too can be on the way to your first Million!

© 2004 Sandy Forster

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sandy Forster, Author of the International Bestseller How to Be Wildly Wealthy FAST, offers more exciting free resources, articles, tele-conferences, books and live events in the areas of prosperity, success and personal empowerment at http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?Clk=2084518

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Depression in men

With all that’s going on in my family right now, I thought I’d talk about the subject of depression in men. Why am I talking about this on a site called Self Confidence 101? Well I think low confidence and self esteem can be very closely related to depression. If you’re depressed, you’re very unlikely to feel confident about taking on a new task.

Depression affects both men and women, but usually men and women respond differently.

Because men are less likely than women to talk about their moods or how they feel emotionally, their depression is often not picked up. If it isn’t detected, it cannot be treated and can then become severe and disabling.

Depression is a common, serious illness
Depression is more than just a low mood – it’s a serious illness that requires attention. People with depression find it hard to manage everyday activities. Depression can have serious effects on physical as well as mental health.

Depression is a known high risk factor for suicide. From 1998 to 2002, the suicide rate in Australia was four times higher in men than women.

Symptoms of depression:

A person may be depressed if they have felt sad, down or miserable most of the time, or lost interest in the things they usually enjoy, for more than two weeks.

Here is a list of other possible symptoms:

General slowing down or restlessness
Neglecting responsibilities and not looking after yourself
Withdrawing from family and friends
Becoming confused, worried and agitated
Inability to find pleasure in any activity
Finding it difficult to get motivated in the morning
Behaving differently from usual
Denying depressive feelings – this can be used as a defense mechanism
Indecisiveness
Loss of self-esteem (see?!)
Persistent suicidal thoughts
Talking negatively e.g. ‘I’m a failure’, ‘ It’s my fault’, ‘Life isn’t worth living’
Worrying about finances
Perceived change of status within the family
Moodiness or irritability – this can come across as anger or aggression
Sadness, hopelessness or emptiness
Feeling overwhelmed, worthless or guilty
Sleeping more or less than usual
Feeling tired all the time
Unexplained headaches, backache or similar complaints
Digestive upsets, nausea, changes in bowel habits
Agitation, hand-wringing, pacing
Loss or change of appetite
Significant weight loss or gain.

If after reading this list you feel you may be suffering from depression, then please get help - you might be surprised at how much better life could be, once you are treated!

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Anger, hate, jealousy and selfishness

“I will waste not even a precious second today in anger or hate or jealousy or selfishness. I know that the seeds I sow I will harvest, because every action, good or bad, is always followed by an equal reaction. I will plant only good seeds this day.”
Og Mandino

I don’t know who Og Mandino is, but he/she is spot on! Holding on to such negative feelings only breed more negativity in your life.

Many feel that I should hate my former husband for the way he treated me over many years, but what’s the point? While he annoys me at times (although not so much lately), I choose to feel gratitude towards him. Why? Because if it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have my beautiful 10 year old daughter. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t know how good I have it now. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t be living the wonderful life I now lead.

My children have a mother who is happy, loving and grateful for what she has. I am 100% positive that they’re much better off than if I were harbouring feelings of anger, hate, jealousy or selfishness.

I think that’s more than enough reason not to waste my energy on negative feelings.

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Be grateful

“Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn’t stop to enjoy it.”
William Feather
1889-1981, Writer

This is another way of saying “stop and smell the roses”!

Appreciate and enjoy what you have!

There is nothing wrong with wanting more - this is how we grow - but you must be grateful for what you already have before you can receive more into your life…

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Positive attitude

“A positive attitude is perhaps more important at home than anywhere else. As spouses and parents, one of our most vital roles is to help those we love feel good about themselves.”
Keith Harrell
Speaker and Author

I love this quote because helping those that you love to feel good about themselves is the greatest gift we could ever give them…

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