Self Responsibility

Taking responsibility for your current situation can be difficult to do if you feel that everything that is wrong with your life is somebody else’s fault.

Someone with a weight problem might say that they’re overweight because there are too many fast food outlets around that tempt them, or someone in a bad relationship might say that they pick bad relationships because they were abused as a child and they just end up in the same situation over and over again.

It is kind of confronting when someone says that your current situation is 100% your fault, and it took me a long time to really believe this to be true.

No, you don’t choose to have fast food outlets everywhere and you don’t choose to be treated badly, but what you do choose to do is react in the way you do.

For example, there are plenty of thin people who live near the same fast food outlets. The difference between you and them is that they choose not go eat there as often as you do. You can choose to limit your fast food consumption to one day a week.

There are millions of other people who have been abused as children, but they don’t all find themselves in bad relationships.

On the other hand, I was never abused as a child but I found myself in a bad relationship – so what caused my situation? It certainly wasn’t abuse as a child!

If you find yourself in a bad relationship, you can choose to leave that relationship, you can choose to stay or you can choose to work on fixing it (if possible). You can also choose to avoid people who are likely to treat you badly, or you can choose to love yourself so that you can find someone who can love you even more!

Here is another example: I work with people who are constantly whining about where we work, how bad their job is, how terrible management are – but they still continue to work there and they’re not looking for employment elsewhere!

They have three choices. They can continue to put up with a job they hate, they can learn to see the positives of working there and be grateful they even have a job, or they can find a job elsewhere!

Until one starts taking responsibility for their situation they will have a lot of trouble making the changes required to improve their life.

What do I do if I am stuck in a job I hate?

It takes a lot of confidence to make a career change, although if you are stuck in a job you hate, you have even more incentive to do something about it!

The following tips will help to make a career transition work for you:

1. Don’t put it off. If you really need to make a change, start taking steps towards making that change now rather than later. Putting it off will only prolong the pain.

2. Decide on exactly what you want to do – what are you passionate about? Be aware of the pros and cons of making the career change and what you hope to lose or gain by doing so.

3. Consider the long term benefits and drawbacks of making this change, rather than the short term benefits.

4. If possible, “try before you buy” so to speak. See if you can volunteer part time, talk to people already in that industry or if you’re considering starting your own business, maybe work on it part time until the income received exceeds your main income. Or if you need to do some study prior to starting your new career, consider studying part time. Be careful to maintain a work/life balance, no matter what you do!

5. Remember hurdles are learning experiences, and learn from them!

6. Only share your plans with people you know will support you. Unfortunately well-meaning people will bring you down even though they are trying to protect your interests.

So many people spend years whining about how much they hate their jobs, and so many do little or nothing about it.

This is the only life you have, and only you can make it better than it is now.

Are you considering a career change? What have you done about it?