Archives for July 2013

Full Half Glass Twinterview

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I recently had the pleasure of being “Twinterviewed” by a parent of one of the boys my daughter plays soccer with.

This Twinterview involved me being asked several short questions relating to personal development, where I had to respond with short answers of 140 characters.

It was actually quite an enjoyable experience – and it didn’t hurt one little bit!

To check out the Twinterview, please visit http://www.fullhalfglass.com/twinterview-michelle-from-selfconfidence101-com/

It is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all

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Love is in the airI love this saying, because I believe it to be soooo true! And there’s a reason for this belief…!

Let me take you back almost a year ago…

I had finally woken up to myself and walked away from a very toxic relationship which had lasted over 2 years, so I was feeling a little fragile.

A male friend from work had indicated that he had a single friend that he wanted to introduce me to, and while I was a bit wary of jumping into anything too soon, I agreed to meet him.

WELL! This fella and I clicked INSTANTLY! He was the sweetest, most amazing guy I had EVER met. EVER! The second we laid eyes on each other, we were both smitten! I’m not sure what was going on there, but my feelings for this guy were intense! And it seemed he felt the same way, and we were messaging each other every day – he would always say the sweetest things! I’d never experienced this before in my life – I felt VERY special!

So that’s the good part…

This “relationship” lasted all of about two and a bit weeks, during which time we caught up twice. And then things went quiet…

So I messaged him to ask if something was up. And sure enough, he’d gone back to his cheating girlfriend. He was very apologetic and kept saying how amazing I was, and if things were different and if he wasn’t so hung up on his girlfriend, then maybe we stood a chance.

I kind of knew we were doomed from the start (different lifestyles, he wanted children – I didn’t, and a bunch of others), but this news absolutely devastated me. Thankfully I was home alone, because I cried my heart out at the news!

I was talking to a male friend of mine online, saying how surprised I was at my reaction to his news. I told him I had no expectations of anything more with this guy, so why was I feeling such a LOSS???

And here’s the gist of what my friend told me:

“You’re grieving the loss of the experience. It’s not something you’ve experienced before – you haven’t been treated so well by somebody before.”

He also went on to say to be prepared, because now that I know what it feels like to be treated this way, I’m going to meet more men who will treat me this way.

It’s like this….

Let’s say you want a new car. You’ve decided on the exact make and model you like, and you’re excited about owning a car like that. And all of a sudden you’re seeing that type of car everywhere! Has that ever happened to you?

The thing is, they were always there, but until you decided you wanted THAT car, your mental filters were blocking them out. Now that you have made your decision, your filter is lifted, and you’re able to see cars of that same make and model.

Same as with relationships. Now that I knew how I wanted to be treated, guess what happened? Within 2 weeks, I met someone who had me so far up on that pedestal it was ridiculous! Needless to say, that one didn’t last because I was probably a little too high up for my liking!

But the point I’m trying to make here is that if you’ve loved and lost, at least you know how it feels like to love, and you’re more likely to find more of the same – or better in the future! If you didn’t know, then it’s hard to recognise it if it appeared before you.

The last 6 months have been crazy for me, and I’m loving every second! Plus I’m meeting men who treat me even BETTER than the gorgeous angel of a man I met almost a year ago.

Who would’ve believed it huh?? :)

Don’t criticise, condemn or complain

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I can’t believe it’s taken me sooooo long to get my hands on “How to win friends and influence people” by Dale Carnegie. I’ve only just started reading, but am loving it already!

I finished Chapter 1 last night, which was titled “If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive”, which was basically saying “Don’t criticise, condemn or complain”.

Hmmm….

One part of this chapter particularly moved me. It was a father writing to his son, who he was watching sleep peacefully. He was talking of the way he spoke to his son, about how impatient he had been with him, how short he was with him, and the remorse he felt over how he had been interacting with his son that day and in the past too.

What he realised, was that he was “condemning” his son for not being exactly like him.

I thought about how I interact with my children, and while I have a great relationship with both of my girls, I realised that I’m nowhere near as patient as I could be with them. Sadly, I’ve not realised until now, how much this can affect them.

So… starting NOW I choose to watch how I interact with my beautiful daughters. All too soon they’ll be growing up and living their own lives, and life’s too short not to make the most of every moment!

Changing our bad habits starts with becoming aware of aspects of ourselves that we could improve on. That’s what the very first chapter of this book did for me. WOW!

What is the WORST thing that could happen?

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When caught up in a situation where I want to do something but feel afraid, my first thought turns to this:

What is the WORST thing that could happen if I did this?

If the worst thing that could happen does not involve the sky falling in, the world ending, or some other great world tragedy, it kind of puts things in perspective for me.

Right now I’m in the midst of working on a launch of a business, which is going to involve me talking to people who I see as potential leaders and people who have vision. And the thought scares the living daylights out of me!!

But when I step back and think about the worst thing that could happen, I have come up with the following outcomes:

  • They could say no (and so what?)
  • They could look at me funny (OMG!)
  • They might say something negative about it (Uh, that’s an issue because…?)
  • They might think less of me (their loss?)
  • They might try to criticise what I’m doing (and if that’s the case, they clearly don’t have the same vision I have, so what’s the issue?)

So as you see, there’s really NOTHING for me to be afraid of!

What about you? Is fear holding you back from getting out there and doing what you want to do in life?

If so, try what I’ve done – work out what the worst possible outcomes could be, and work with them. Are the outcomes REALLY that bad? Try to put them in perspective.

If a friend was facing a similar situation, what advice would you give them (sometimes it’s easier to see another person’s situation with much more clarity)?

Ok, so now you’re thinking that what you want to do isn’t so scary, right?? 😉

I really love your book!

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Dear Michelle,
I really love your book!! It was great and downright inspiring. I also
love the “workbook”, I’ve renamed it “How to become happy”, since it
really helped me see things more positive with a lot more confidence.
I’m on the best way to confidence, thx to you :)
Thank you so much,
Yours sincerely,
Tam

Great website and really good information

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Great website & really good information. I especially like the article on how to start the day happy. :) Every moment, our life is dictated by how we respond to things. The ideas you suggest to help this are great.

Kathy

3 tips to manifest what you want in life

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I recently came across these three tips, which I wanted to share with you today.

These are nothing new – in fact, I’ve heard these tips before. But we often need reminding in our busy lives, right?

Ok, so what are these 3 tips for manifesting what you want?

Here they are:

  1. Declutter – Yuk. I know, I know… nobody likes this task, but it HAS to be done! As one of my mentors once taught me, decluttering creates space to attract more of what you want in your life. Got stuff you don’t want or need (this includes people!)? Then get cracking and declutter your home, office, emails, computer, iPad, phone, etc etc etc!!
  2. Identify your vision – Find yourself a big sheet of cardboard, or a pin board, or you could even do this on your computer. Now go find pictures, quotes and words that reflect what you want in your life. Go crazy making your vision board and be sure to put it somewhere that you can see it every day.
  3. Get writing!! WARNING: SORE HAND COMING YOUR WAY!!! Ok ok it’s not that bad, but I started this last night, and after almost 40 minutes of constant writing, I DID have a sore hand! So… you need to write a key affirmation 55 times a day for 5 days. Yup. You heard it right! Your affirmation could read something like this: “Thank you Universe for my ________. I feel very excited about my future!” Again, you have to write this affirmation FIFTY FIVE times. And repeat this FIVE days in a row!

I started this process last night with my first day of 55×5. Today I’ll begin the decluttering and vision board tasks (decluttering is going to take a little while – I’m almost certain!).

My affirmation was: “Thank you Universe, for my Wings and Wheels. I feel very excited about my financial future!” If you’re not sure what my affirmation relates to (I’ve talked a little about it here), go check out http://mishyd.worldventures.biz and watch Video #2. It’ll explain exactly why I’m so excited about my life right now, and why I’m so focused on manifesting my “Wings and Wheels”!

Let’s see how different my life looks in 5 days!? I’ll post my progress for sure, as I’ve just started on my new journey! :)

When was the last time you reviewed your goals and dreams?

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Um, it became apparent to me this morning as I reviewed my list of “100 things to do before I die”, that it’s been several years since I last reviewed mine, because there were regular references to my now ex husband! Oops!

Ok, so this may look like a “Do as I say, not as I do” type scenario, but I am pleased to announced that all references to said ex hubby no longer exist, and I’ve changed and added a few more items to the list.

I’ve added in visits to various destinations that I didn’t even know existed until the last week, to my list, plus several other things I’d like to try, such as paddle boarding and kite surfing!

So… when was the last time you reviewed your goals and dreams? If it was more than a month ago, get in there and do it now! 😉

What will your life look like in retirement?

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I’ve been doing some reading about retirement and stats about how much people have to live on once they’re working no more, and OMG I am shocked!

I shouldn’t be, because I’ve worked in the Superannuation industry here in Australia for the last 11 years, but it’s looking pretty grim.

They’re saying that most people will run out of money in around 11 years!!

And come to think of it, I remember many occasions of people coming in to withdraw their retirement savings – everything they had – and it was a measly $15,000 or so.

What on earth do they think they’re going to be able to do with THAT???

I’m 41 now, and that means that if I’m planning on working for someone else for the rest of my working years, I have around 20 years to sort my savings out.

TWENTY YEARS???? NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ve already been working that long! And I have to work ANOTHER TWENTY YEARS????

Blah!

Ok, so you’ve probably guessed that the prospect of spending another year, let alone another 20 in the workforce, is not an appealing one for me. And you’re right.

I’m sorry but I want to live my fun years NOW, while I’m still young enough to fully enjoy them! Once I’m 60, who knows what my body will be like? Will I be all hunched over and wrinkly? Mmmm… not a great look on a white sandy beach!

So no. I will NOT wait till I’m in my 60’s to retire. I’d rather do things much sooner than that.

With that in mind, what could you do with another $500 a month? Reduce debt, build savings, take a fabulous holiday? And what if to achieve that, it was something that was relatively easy (and simple) to do? And what if you didn’t have to do a massive amount of work to achieve it?

Want to know more? Please Contact me. :)

Are you going to be working in a job for the rest of your life?

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tropical4I’ve been lucky enough to meet some very successful people in the last 8 years or so, and none of them actually work for someone else (funny that).

They’ve made their money by achieving results based purely on their own performance, rather than the performance of the organisation they work for.

For many years now, I have known I am meant for so much more than the 9 to 5 grind, but I’ve been yet to come across something that not only will make me money, but is in an industry I’m passionate about too. I want to be excited about what I’m doing!

Imagine being able to set your own hours! Imagine being able to take a vacation whenever you want! Imagine working hard and getting rewarded for it, every single month! Imagine feeling excited about starting your work day! Imagine being able to travel to exotic destinations, several times a year!!!

For most people this is the unattainable dream, but I’ve seen it happen too many times for me to not believe it can happen to me. Many of these people are less educated than I am, they’re not as smart, they didn’t have as good a start in life. So if they can do it, why can’t I???

You know what sets them apart from everyone else? They see what they want and they go after it! They don’t let “dream stealers” get to them – they are so lazer-focused on their goals, that nobody can sway them! They’re goal-setting machines!

Are you going to be working in a job for the rest of your life? Or are you looking for something more? What are your goals for the future? Do you want to work for the next 40 years or would you rather have better for yourself?

If you’re into travelling, I might have something you’re interested in… This is a travel club with a difference. Not only do you receive massive discounts on travel, but you can make money from it too. What’s not to like?? 😉

Visit http://mishyd.worldventures.biz and watch the 3 videos. Want to know more? Then please Contact me.