You are here: Home / Archives for 2009

Need help realising your dreams?

September 24, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Butterfly 70x70

For me, boosting your self confidence begins with setting goals and then working towards achieving them.

As you reach each milestone, you feel a little sense of achievement, and your confidence improves as you take each and every step forward.

My good friend Nik Halik has set up a community especially for people who want to dream big and get out there and realise those dreams, and because it’s free to join, I figured I’d talk about it here on occasion.

The reason for my post today is because I’ve just been sent a video called Pathways to Freedom by Nik and co and it’s really inspirational.

If you want to check out the video, visit http://www.TheThrillionaires.com?id=130, then go into the blog, and search for it there. You will be glad you did!

Filed Under: Tools

My newly implemented 20 point plan

September 19, 2009 By Leave a Comment
20 point plan

20 point plan 150x150 My newly implemented 20 point planI’ve not been around lately because I’ve been extremely busy with my business – in fact, I rarely have time to take any time out for myself these days, which I am somewhat struggling with.

I had a great conversation with my mentor yesterday (even coaches need mentors/coaches!) and I was discussing with him my struggle to find the time to get everything done each day, as well as take time out for myself.

He offered me a great tool for managing my productivity around my business and I thought I’d pass it on to you, my dedicated readers! This tool can be used for business and can be modified to help you achieve personal goals too.

I find that sometimes my productivity wanes – I’m not doing things that are helping my business to grow to a point where I can find ways to leverage of other people, and this is partly my problem.

The tool is a 20 point plan or checklist, and here are the steps to implement this:

  1. Write down everything you do that contributes to generating income for your business, or something that contributes to a specific goal.
  2. Allocate points to each task. For example, if I go to see a client or do some networking, that is worth 2 points. If I email a potential client or update my blog then that is worth .1 per email/post. If I pick up a new client then I get 5 points.
  3. Work towards achieving 20 points per day.
  4. Once you have reached 20 points you can take some time out!

You will need to be honest with yourself here. Only give decent points to items that contribute the most to your goals, and of course only allocate points to productive tasks.

What’s great about this tool is that you are likely to focus on productive tasks to get points, rather than tasks that will not take you closer to your goal.

As you near 20 points, you will begin to feel a sense of accomplishment – you’re almost there! Reach 20 and you get to celebrate! Woohoo!

Once you

Filed Under: Personal Development

When was the last time you reviewed your goals?

August 18, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Goals

goal 150x150 When was the last time you reviewed your goals?If you have read through this website you will know that I truly believe that through setting goals you can dramatically boost your self confidence and self esteem.

The reason I think this is because achieving any goal, no matter how small it is, will give you some sense of achievement. As you gradually create bigger and better goals, you will begin to see some dramatic changes in your mindset too.

You will consider some challenges as “nothing” when once upon a time, the same challenges used to scare the life out of you! The standards you set for yourself improve too.

Setting goals and striving to achieve them is also a lot of fun! What is your biggest goal? What can you do each day to get you closer to your goal? How excited do you feel as you get closer?!

So if you have goals, when was the last time you reviewed them? (You have written them down, right?).

Sometimes as we go through life we kind of grow out of some of our goals, and that’s perfectly ok – as long as you replace them with new goals!

Set up a time over the next week to really focus on your goals and give them the attention they deserve – you will be glad you did!

If you’ve got some huge goals that you have absolutely NO idea how you’re going to achieve them, visit The Thrillionaires. This site is officially launching on August 24 (the date has changed, for anybody who has already taken a look) and it’s free to join.

The idea is to fill out your own goal list and then start living all of your wildest dreams.

Depending on what you want to do, the Thrillionaires community even helps you find the funding to pursue those dreams. People are joining all over the world–with incredible stories and achievements, so be sure to at least check it out and sign up for free.

Filed Under: Self Confidence, Self Esteem, Setting Goals

Do you want to be a Thrillionaire?

August 9, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Butterfly 70x70

I am an avid believer in setting huge goals and taking steps to achieve them, and that is partly thanks to my good friend Nik Halik.

Of all of the people I have ever known, he has taken goal achievement to an entirely new level.

As a child, he mapped out what he wanted to achieve in his life. He had health and other issues that normally would have prevented anyone else from doing what they wanted to achieve, but he didn’t let this stop him.

On August 15, the Thrillionaires community will be launched and is free to join.

If you want to achieve more in life, then this site might provide you with the inspiration you need.

If you want to join the Thrillionaires community, click HERE.

Filed Under: Personal Development

Beautiful!

July 15, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Butterfly 70x70

I know this has nothing to do with the content on this website, but somebody posted a comment on my writing blog with a link to this YouTube song, and I just had to share.

I had goosebumps while listening to it!

Filed Under: Personal Development

Goal Achieved! I Have Quit My Job!

July 15, 2009 By 2 Comments
Butterfly 70x70

Good morning! It’s been a while since I last posted and I truly apologise – life has been amazingly hectic and has changed dramatically over the past few weeks, which I am going to tell you about now, in case you haven’t read of my story – I’m so excited!

On May 19 I came across a somebody called Barry Walls on the Warrior Forum (a forum for internet marketers). Somebody had started a thread that talked about her celebrating her success after being awarded $20 commission on a ClickBank sale. She had been working at it for 7 long months.

Most people responded with encouragement and congratulations, except Barry.

Barry wasn’t all that “congratulatory”! In fact, he said he could have worked in a third world country during that time and walked away with more money! This generated many harsh comments towards him, but I realised that he was 100% right in what he said. Ok, he didn’t have to be so harsh, but what he said was 100% true.

So many people work their butts off for very little reward, and he was simply pointing this out.

He went on to say was that he could teach her to make more than that (he even suggested up to $1000 per DAY!) within a few months. He even offered her FREE coaching!

She did not take him up on his offer. I, on the other hand, wanted to know more – a LOT more, so I contacted him.

I wanted to know what he had to offer. He told me what he had been coaching people face to face and they had all experienced amazing results. I wanted in, so asked him how much I could pay him to coach me.

He told me that he almost had ready an online version of his coaching program, and he’d offer me a discount if I was prepared to be a “guinea pig” so to speak, and to help him by offering feedback on each module as they came through.

My credit card was out within a millisecond and I got started! I was THAT desperate to lose my full time job and work from home, I was prepared to try anything that worked!

So I began the course, which taught me how to get work writing articles for other business owners. Prior to this I had been writing and submitting my own articles to article directories, and of course on my websites, so this wasn’t anything new, although I’d never written for somebody else before.

What I love about what I do now is the fact that I get to choose who I write for and therefore the type of writing I do, so many of my clients are fellow Life Coaches!

6 weeks after I began the course, I was making enough to quit my job. I was pretty well-paid before in my job, so to see these results in only 6 weeks – well, I’ve never experienced that before and I’ve done a lot of courses!

This post wasn’t supposed to be all about the course I’m doing though. It’s supposed to be about the goal I had written down only a few months ago.

I was extremely passionate about my goal because this goal was about life change for me. I no longer wanted to get up at 5am, work all day and go to bed at night without having the time or the freedom to spend with my children. They mean everything to me, and I was being deprived of my right to enjoy being with them!

We all have choices in life, and my choice was to take my life into my own hands and make some drastic changes. It took a long time, but it was so totally worth it.

My goal was to be working from home and making more money than I was in my job. At this point it didn’t matter how much more – I just wanted it to be more! icon smile Goal Achieved! I Have Quit My Job! The date I had written on my goal card was June 30.

I left my job on June 26! How good is THAT!!??

Now I truly believe that if I hadn’t written down my goal and wasn’t as specific as I was, then I really don’t know if Barry Walls and I would have crossed paths. If we did, I’m not sure I would have tracked him down and insisted that he coach me!

So whatever your goal, be specific and write it down, and be sure to give your goal a due date to generate a sense of urgency – you will be glad you did!

If you like to write and would like to know more about Barry’s course, visit http://use-sell.com/2/s81718/1512454ig/101847

Filed Under: Setting Goals

Who Creates Your Reality

May 8, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Butterfly 70x70

Who creates your reality?  Why is your life the way it is so?  What is your purpose in life?

I was reading as I regularly do and came across this passage that is a Sioux Creation Myth that explains this quite well:

The Creator gathered all of Creation and said, “I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it.  It is the realisation that they create their own reality.”  The eagle said, “Give it to me, I will take it to the moon.”  The Creator said, “No.  One day they will go there and find it.”  The salmon said, “I will bury it on the bottom of the ocean.”  “No.  They will go there too.”  The buffalo said, “I will bury it on the Great Plains.”  The Creator said, “They will cut into the skin of the Earth and find it even there.”

Grandmother Mole, who lives in the breast of Mother Earth, and who has no physical eyes but sees wtih spiritual eyes, said, “Put it inside of them.”  And the Creator said, “It is done.”

All too often I hear of people blaming their reality on forces outside of themselves and I was once one of those people.  Once I realised that my reality comes from within, I was able to control my own destiny and my life dramatically changed for the better.

Filed Under: Personal Development, Self Confidence

Domestic Violence – Should I get out?

May 7, 2009 By 2 Comments
Butterfly 70x70

Being caught up in a domestic violence situation is not a situation anyone wants to be in.

I have found over time that my articles on domestic violence receive a lot of views and this concerns me in a way because it probably means there are people in this situation who are looking for answers.  It could also be that the friends and family of those caught in an abusive relationship are searching for ways to help their friends.

I came across a forum post from a woman was telling us that as she typed, her husband was lying unconscious and drunk in the bathroom and it was only 7.30pm.  What really made her angry was that they had a young son together and he had witnessed his father coming home drunk, then vomiting everywhere.  Not very nice at all.

The number of responses from women who had all been in similar situations was astounding, although one response in partcular I found to be very valuable.

All of the women suggested that this woman put her foot down with her husband and tell him that enough was enough (he was doing this regularly and after apologising and telling her he wouldn’t do it again, was continuing on the cycle – this is also typical of abusers) and give him an ultimatum.   But the last response was probably the most important of all.  While this was in response to a question around an alcohol problem, this could be applied to abuse situations, or drug addition.

She offered the following advice:

  • Her son’s safety had to come first, regardless of whether she left him or stayed.  If he wasn’t abusive before, he could become abusive if he felt his way of life was being threatened.
  • Get as much support from family and friends as you can – you’re going to need it!
  • Be sure that you have copies (and originals) of all important documents, such as bank account details, birth certificates, marriage certificates, etc and have a friend or relative keep these safe for you.
  • The same goes for photos and other sentimental items – things could get ugly, so it is best to be prepared.
  • Contact your local support group (there are plenty around that support the families of abusers, alcoholics or addicts)

Getting out of any relationship is always difficult, but if you have the right support around you, then the load will feel significantly lighter.

You know deep down inside whether you should stay or go, but always remember to consider your safety and that of your children (if you have any) first.  I cannot stress this enough.

Filed Under: Domestic Violence

Should I tell someone that they make me feel inferior?

May 6, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Butterfly 70x70

Should you tell someone that they make you feel inferior?

There are obviously two possible answers to this question:  Yes or No.

Consider this:  What is it about this person that makes you feel inferior? Do you think they are doing it on purpose?  Does it happen often?  Are you being over-sensitive?  If you were to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, do you think they would feel the same way you do?  Do others feel the same way about this person?  How are you perceiving this situation?  If you looked at it from a different angle, would it still look the same?

Also read my post on the subject: http://selfconfidence101.com/self-confidence/nobody-can-make-you-feel-inferior-without-your-consent/.  It’s brief but it does explain how many people don’t even realise they are “making” people feel inferior.

Nobody can actually “make” you feel inferior – that comes from you and the little voice in your head that tells you to feel that way!

If this person’s words or actions are really upsetting to you and you really feel that you need to say something to them, then it is important to think about how you are going to say it.

For example, you might want to approach this person in the following way:

“When you do X in Y situation, I feel like Z”…

Fill in the X with their action/words, Y is the situation (eg. during a meeting, when discussing arrangements for that event last week, etc) and Z is how you felt when they did/said what they did.

Tackling situations in a positive way and avoiding the aggressive approach is usually the best way to solve a conflict, and as I said above, this person may have no idea they are doing what you perceive them to be doing!  On the other hand, they may be fully aware of this and there is probably little you can do to change the way they are.

Your other option is to say nothing and if this is the path you choose, consider the following points:

  • If you choose to say nothing, but plan on stewing on the issue for years to come, then maybe this is not the best option for you!
  • Is the situation really that important, and if not, then maybe it is best to let it go (consider the point above first!)?
  • Is the other person continuing to act in this way, and if so, do you think that saying nothing is the answer to solving the issue?

As you can see, there are different ways to look at the situation and the decision about whether to say something can be a lot more complex than you originally thought!  Look at your options from various angles and make the choice that you believe will work best for you.

Filed Under: Self Confidence

What is your motivation to lose weight?

May 4, 2009 By Leave a Comment
Butterfly 70x70

If you want to lose weight because your doctor said you should or you’re scared of getting heart disease or diabetes, then it is unlikely you will be able to keep the motivation going to follow through and achieve your weight loss goals.

On the other hand, if you want to lose weight because you really want to improve quality of your life, then you have a much higher chance of success!

Many people are initially motivated by fear or they feel they are being pressured to lose weight and unfortunately this isn’t a very inspiring way to stay focused and on track!

Being motivated this way really focuses on the negatives – what you hope to lose if you don’t lose weight, rather than the positives – what you will gain through weight loss.

So if you’re one of those people who has decided they want to lose weight, start to look at the real reasons why you want to.

If you’re initially driven by fear of what you could lose, try to look at what you will get out of losing weight. List down all of the benefits, and keep your focus on these as you get closer to your goal.

Even better, find a weight loss buddy to go through your weight loss journey with you and make it someone who will encourage you and support you and challenge you to succeed.

 

Related articles

Lose weight and improve your self esteem

Filed Under: Self Confidence, Weight Loss
« Older Posts