Archives for March 2008

Be grateful

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Gratitude is by far one of the best ways to attract more good into your life.

Look at all of the good things in your life. Before long, the bad things will start to pale in comparison.

Appreciate the good in others

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Compliment others (don’t go over the top!). Acknowledge others for what they have done for you or for others. Show them you appreciate them. Show an interest in them. People love that!

Pick up your pace

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People with confidence walk quickly. Fake it until you make it! Not only will walking faster make you look more confident, but if you walk fast enough, you might get a bit of a workout too! :)

How to improve your self confidence

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I came across some tips on how to improve your self confidence today, so I figured I would pass them on to my loyal website visitors over a series of posts, so visit each day to make sure you don’t miss any! Of course you can just look at older posts and there they are, but hey – I’m trying to help you out here! :)

Number 1

Dress well. Not only will you look better, but for some strange reason you will start to feel better too.

When you don’t look good, you know it, and this comes across in how you interact with others.

You don’t have to spend a fortune either. Mix and match – that’s the best way to keep your finances under control!

Illegal drugs – why do people take them?

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I personally believe a person’s self esteem will determine their likelihood of turning to illegal drugs.

Would someone who thought highly about themself turn to drugs, which can not only be harmful, but can be deadly too? I think not!

This is yet another reason why parents should do whatever they can to keep their children’s self esteem is as high as it can possibly be, so they will want to say no if and when they are ever offered drugs, carrying them into a drug-free adulthood.

It is my hope that my children will know the importance of saying no to such a mindless act as taking illegal drugs, because they have the level of confidence and self esteem required to know they are doing the right thing and will not be swayed by self esteem.

What do others think about this?

How can you tell if your child lacks confidence?

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Hmmm. This one I ponder because I have two daughters, aged 10 and 1. Whilst it’ll be a while before I have too much to worry about with my younger daughter, I am compelled to ensure my older daughter doesn’t go down the road that I did.

So how can a parent tell if their child lacks self confidence? I have no idea!

I suppose it might be a case of watching how they interact with others, how they go at school, and the types of friends they have. She is only 10, so the “bad” years are yet to come – hopefully her self esteem will be high enough then so she doesn’t make the bad choices I did!

So how does a parent help build a child’s self esteem?

I think there are a few things you can do:

– Praise them for doing well

– Never, EVER put them down

– Always offer encouragement

– Allow them to do things for themselves (as they get older, allow them to make their own lunch, if they want to cook you dinner, let them, and make sure it’s age-appropriate)

– Punish them for doing the wrong thing where appropriate (we usually ban her from using the computer for a week, or we might take something else away)

– Don’t go over the top with punishment or praise that matter. You need to keep it at a good balance.

– Tell you love them and appreciate them – Often!

A child that knows they are loved and appreciated will always have more confidence than a child who experiences no love or appreciation in the home.

Depression in men

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With all that’s going on in my family right now, I thought I’d talk about the subject of depression in men. Why am I talking about this on a site called Self Confidence 101? Well I think low confidence and self esteem can be very closely related to depression. If you’re depressed, you’re very unlikely to feel confident about taking on a new task.

Depression affects both men and women, but usually men and women respond differently.

Because men are less likely than women to talk about their moods or how they feel emotionally, their depression is often not picked up. If it isn’t detected, it cannot be treated and can then become severe and disabling.

Depression is a common, serious illness
Depression is more than just a low mood – it’s a serious illness that requires attention. People with depression find it hard to manage everyday activities. Depression can have serious effects on physical as well as mental health.

Depression is a known high risk factor for suicide. From 1998 to 2002, the suicide rate in Australia was four times higher in men than women.

Symptoms of depression:

A person may be depressed if they have felt sad, down or miserable most of the time, or lost interest in the things they usually enjoy, for more than two weeks.

Here is a list of other possible symptoms:

General slowing down or restlessness
Neglecting responsibilities and not looking after yourself
Withdrawing from family and friends
Becoming confused, worried and agitated
Inability to find pleasure in any activity
Finding it difficult to get motivated in the morning
Behaving differently from usual
Denying depressive feelings – this can be used as a defense mechanism
Indecisiveness
Loss of self-esteem (see?!)
Persistent suicidal thoughts
Talking negatively e.g. ‘I’m a failure’, ‘ It’s my fault’, ‘Life isn’t worth living’
Worrying about finances
Perceived change of status within the family
Moodiness or irritability – this can come across as anger or aggression
Sadness, hopelessness or emptiness
Feeling overwhelmed, worthless or guilty
Sleeping more or less than usual
Feeling tired all the time
Unexplained headaches, backache or similar complaints
Digestive upsets, nausea, changes in bowel habits
Agitation, hand-wringing, pacing
Loss or change of appetite
Significant weight loss or gain.

If after reading this list you feel you may be suffering from depression, then please get help – you might be surprised at how much better life could be, once you are treated!

I finally did it!

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I have a goal, and that is to generate a sufficient online income so I can quit my “real” job and continue to work from home.

The reason I have this goal is because I look at my two beautiful babies growing up before my eyes and I don’t want to miss a second!

So today I finally launched my first major product which is an internet marketing coaching program.

Writing the workbook was easy, although it took a LONG time! I wanted it to be perfect! I also had to put together some freebies to offer on my new website, so potential customers could get an idea of what to expect.

What was difficult for me was recording the video tutorials. I don’t like being on video at the best of times, so luckily these videos were all of the screen with my voice explaining what each step was. I don’t particularly like recording my voice either, so this was difficult for me and I had to fight the temptation to re-record each video several times over!

This was the first time I had ever done something like this, so maybe it was just the jump out of my comfort zone that made it “difficult”?

Anyway, all is done now and I am so happy to have finally launched my new product! I’ve already had over 63 hits on my site and it’s been live for only around 10 hours! I am sooo happy about that!

Anyway, if you’re interested, take a look at www.ultimatecoachingprogram.com and let me know what you think!

Happy anniversary to me!

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It’s my 3rd wedding anniversary today and to celebrate I bought my husband a boring card and although I told him I didn’t want anything (I really didn’t want anything), he bought me some lovely gold earrings. Hmm. Who got the better deal? I did!

I don’t take total blame for this situation though. He knows (and I tell him often!) that he cannot go wrong if he buys me clothing, jewelry, or perfume. He tells me he doesn’t know what he wants, so how on earth am I supposed to know what to buy him?

Anyway, instead of giving him something material, I gave him lots of hugs and kisses and told him how much I appreciate him. Men like to know they’re appreciated, I have been told!

It’s his birthday in a month, so I’ve got some time up my sleeve to come up with something sensational! Gift ideas anyone??

Anger, hate, jealousy and selfishness

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“I will waste not even a precious second today in anger or hate or jealousy or selfishness. I know that the seeds I sow I will harvest, because every action, good or bad, is always followed by an equal reaction. I will plant only good seeds this day.”
Og Mandino

I don’t know who Og Mandino is, but he/she is spot on! Holding on to such negative feelings only breed more negativity in your life.

Many feel that I should hate my former husband for the way he treated me over many years, but what’s the point? While he annoys me at times (although not so much lately), I choose to feel gratitude towards him. Why? Because if it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have my beautiful 10 year old daughter. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t know how good I have it now. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t be living the wonderful life I now lead.

My children have a mother who is happy, loving and grateful for what she has. I am 100% positive that they’re much better off than if I were harbouring feelings of anger, hate, jealousy or selfishness.

I think that’s more than enough reason not to waste my energy on negative feelings.